The headline "Father killed trying to break up fight involving son" caught my attention this morning, as reported by the Houston Chronicle. Apparently a dad stepped in the way of a bullet intended for his son, who was in an argument out in front of their house.
Wow, talk about the ultimate heroic act! He makes a split second decision that saves his son but costs him his life. It's altogether tragic for his dad, but it loudly begs the most obvious question to me: "Would I do the same for my son?"
I remember when my first child came along almost 10 years ago, and I would have these stress dreams about crazy things happening to her that were out of my control. Or I would be driving along in traffic and a violent scenario would come to mind where I envisioned losing her to some freak accident. It always shook me to my core, and I found myself thinking through how I would react if that type of situation actually became reality.
Maybe it's because we're constantly bombarded with crime and violence from the media every day. Maybe it's more personal than that, such as the dad I went to college with getting shot to death when he tried to defend his disabled son from the jeering comments from the car next to them. Maybe it's because we just care so deeply for our family members and the thought of anything happening to them is more than we can bare.
Fortunately my kids are all healthy and have not had to experience crime or danger like the stories I mentioned above. But I think it's good for us as dads to mentally prepare ourselves and think through our reactions, in case such events do happen to our families.
It's also good to realize that our actions can have consequences that negatively affect our families.
Take our family vacation to Disneyland last year. We chose to drive from Oregon to California, and if you've ever made that drive you know that it's a 90-mile-an-hour adrenaline rush with some of craziest drivers you've ever seen zooming in and out of traffic right in front of you.
About midway through the return trip home, we pulled into a truck stop to fuel up. It was one of those trucks stops with a couple fast food restaurants, gas station, and a couple food marts.
As I started to pull into the gas station, two young punks in a pickup truck pulled right in front of me and took my spot at the pump. Believe me, after several hours of driving 95 miles an hour and passing countless cars of my own, I was maxed out on adrenaline. All of the other pumps were taken and had a car or two lined up, and I immediately through my hands in the air with a "WTF?!?" expression on my face.
Oh they saw me all right, and as they got out of the truck I could tell they could care less that they had cut me off - in fact, they seemed amused by my irritation and all too willing to get in a fight about it. Warning flags started waving in my mind as I also realized that my reactions could very well be putting my family in danger.
I kept driving past them and waited in line at a pump a few lanes down from them, sucked up my broken ego, and silently hoped they would just leave us alone. Fortunately they did, but the situation left a permanent marker and reminder in my mind that I can't do that kind of crap anymore when it can affect my family.
What if they had taken offense at my response, and started fighting with me? What if they had pulled knife or a gun?
As a dad, I just can't take those kinds of stupid risks anymore when the livelihood of my family is at stake! Instead, I resolve to protect them at all cost - even if it means stepping in front of a bullet or throwing myself in harms way to protect my child or wife. And I hope that if the situation presents itself, I will be able to rise to the occasion after having mentally prepared myself ahead of time.
